Could it be that I played a game to lose you, I can't maintain

Happy 100th post to this blog (:

Yesterday.

Went for poa &ss rememdial after sending dear off to school.
The ss remedial was very useful (:
Other than that, it was a rather dull day.
Went home only @ 3 after being at point with yujia.
&i didnt do anything after that other than using the computer.

Today.

Saw dear for only half &hour in the morning- sent him off again, after my dad left the house.
I was literally bored to death.
But had to make myself busy because i didnt want to keep thinking ): ): ):
Really didnt feel good. ;/

Dont have to read >;( - just rantings ;/

The time we meet or spent tgt is like getting lesser ):
Its like u don't care already.
Like i say; if u want ever find some one else, please tell me. :/
Because it seem like I'm always the one asking u if we can meet/can u meet me.- which i have always dislike.
You don't seem like u don't believe that i love u so much. ;/
Is it because the way i treat u ? - i really don't know, why did i react like that today....
Hais, everything seem so deaad. ):
i don't want it to be like that; really.
I miss u so much. ): ):